This morning I woke up inside the body of a man, who was inside the body of another man, like a trucker or barber. I couldn’t really tell. I just felt greasy. Clamy. I prefer to wake up inside the body of Cher, or a kitty cat, or the Captain of a Carnival Cruise Line, like the Princess of the Sea, but it wasn’t my lucky day. I called my BFF Squinny and s/he said that s/he woke up inside the body of another person as well but Squinny was pissed because she woke up inside the body of Tim Tebow and William Levy. I was like no way and s/he was like totally yah way. I asked hir how s/he was inside two bodies at once and Squinny said s/he didn’t know but it was true true. I was like are you sure and Squinny was like I’m so sure. I was stunned. Mortified. I told Squinny she was a true artist.
I asked Squinny if Tim and William have sex with each other and Squinny said don’t be silly. William wouldn’t go for Tim even if Tim were a football star. I had to pee first and then I told Squinny that being inside the body of two men at the same time is like being inside your home and your neighbor’s home at the same time. Squinny said that’s how s/he feels everyday inside hir own body. Squinny said s/he feels like s/he occupies two homes at once, like matter and anti matter, one home in outer space and the other in inner space. Squinny made me think about home and what makes one. I asked Squinny if s/he wanted to go for a walk. I asked Squinny if s/he wanted to play football or play Actors & Actresses, or both. Squinny wasn’t amused, but s/he looked gorgeous on the outside of hir new inner bodies. Even the color of hir eyes reflected the multitudes inside. Finally, I gambled and asked Squinny if s/he wanted to be a boy or a girl when s/he grows up. Steve just smiled a big ass what do you think smile and said yes.