I haven’t been able to post because of my _____ relations with my new boyfriend _______ who is from Nicaragua, which is close to Nevada, but not really close. I swear I’ll never tell mom cause she’s against sex before marriage even though she had me before she was married. Actually, she had me the first time she had sex. Bad luck, she said. I guess, I said. Anyway, I don’t speak to mom anymore cause she’s nuts. Certified USDA. When Amanda B. and I returned from Disney World, we discovered mom had broken into her house. Mom’s footprints were all over the walls. (Amanda B. is my mom’s ex-girlfriend who was once a boy many many years ago named Steve.) Anyway, after I ran away from mom, Amanda B. rescued me, but I’m safe now. I’m in my own skin now. I’m waiting for Amanda B. to bring me tea and chocolate chip cookies. Waiting for her to tell me the story about Big Foot. The story about his inability to gain national credibility.