Dear Friends & Enemies, help a girl out. Yes, it’s that time of year. I have to pay my goshdamn rent and you can help me when you shop and spend all the money you don’t have on useless holiday gifts for friends and family you don’t really like at my store. This Black Friday spend some of your hard-earned credit at Almost Dorothy’s Tee Shirt Shop where you can buy more than tee shirts. I sell baby bibs, cameras, clock, and panties with my logo.
Yes, you can have my picture on your ass. And it’s all for a semi-good but not such a great cause, my cause, the cause of providing me Internet service so I can continue to cause trouble in Cyberspace. The tee shirt shop keeps me off the streets, literally, even though it doesn’t keep ma off the streets. She likes to walk. Anyway, shop till your Black Friday hearts drop. Share and spread the joy to all your friends. Heck, randomly post this link on their Facebook walls or email it them.
Love ya, Almost Dorothy.