Posted in Almost Dorothy

14 things I learned this year


Every
Tomb Has a Heart | Photo by Neil de la Flor
Every Tomb Has a Heart | Photo by
Neil de la Flor

1.
Mozart is not a form of art. Mozart creates art out of music which
are squiggles and lines that punctuate the night as ma conjures up
the songs of stars while eating potato chips. In bed.

2. Love is a sin. Sex is a
gift from God.

3.
Sometimes Mozart wears a wig as a boy and sometimes I wear a wig as
Mozart.

4. The magic
flute isn’t a ride at Disney World but every ride is a form of
magic.

5. Never say
bad things. Never have a sense of humor. Never use incense to cast
out ghosts and ghouls unless you’re a psychic vampire. Or naked. In
the backyard. Beneath the full moon and the twinkling
nightlights.

6.
Psychic vampires don’t exist except as tools to dehumanize the
humans who try to heal the human wounds of the world through any
and every means necessary, even through acrobatics and mind
melding, as the real vampires of the world play a game of dice as a
tool to reveal the two sides of the wound. In your room.

7. The devil on your back is
there for a reason.

8. Every tomb had a heart and every
heart has a wound.

9. Photographs are faster than the
speed of kissing.

10. I have an obsessive personality
disorder activated by karma and guilt, kitsch and chaos.

11. I avoid electrical socks
and rush hour traffic.

12. Trauma can be
transferred.

13.
There are no secrets, just blindfolds that lead us to secret
locations.

14.
Humans cry for positive things to happen that have already
happened.

A few more things I
learned but they’re not so important

15. I joined a cult, not a culture
club.

16. The
coolest person in the world sleeps in my bed and barks.

17. We are bound by our silly
nature—not by Ganesha or Shiva, God or some Divine Diva, astral
projections or numerological aspirations—no matter how hard we
pretend.

18.
Sometimes the “Smallest of Things” are bigger than the “Biggest of
Things”.

19. Even if
we die nameless, we always live in shame unless we laugh at our
slips and falls.

20.
I am the two sides of the wound.

21. I may or may not be
pregnant.

Author:

I'm not real, but I'm a writer.

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