Posted in Politics, Themes

Alex Sink for FL Governor

Yo bitches, I mean ladies and gentlemen and their pets, please vote for Alex Sink. She’s the only verified human candidate running for Governor of Florida. She’s not a multimillion dollar evil-empire tycoon like her scandalous opponent, Rick Scott, also known as Gollum from The Lord of the Rings.  So, for those of you who are super busy, you can register right now, online, to vote for Alex Sink by mail. Here’s the link. This message has not been approved by ma’ so it’s probably the right thing to do for Florida. Ma’s got the herpes right now so she’s in no shape to make any sense. Her lip looks like an exploded sausage. Oops, off track. Help save Florida from the evil Gollum, (Rick Scott), who wants to destroy our precious state with his Precious Greed. Alex Sink for FL Governor.

Posted in Almost Dorothy, Politics, Themes

Dear Rick Scott

Gollum (Rick Scott)

Ma says you suck and that your commercial for governor sucks too. She says suck almost always after she says Scott. Scott sucks this. Scott sucks that. It’s like you’re a sucking machine. After listening to ma talk about how you suck, I want to get a lollipop and suck it. Ma especially hates your advertisement that promotes a 7 step plan for bringing jobs back to Florida. She says, and I quote, “it sucks!” Let’s address your advertisement point by point: Continue reading “Dear Rick Scott”